Apparently bigshot TV lawyers aren’t the only ones leaving the big life to move to an unlikely location this season: actual lawyers are moving all the way from NYC to West Covina, California, approx. 2 hours from the beach (4 if there’s traffic).

After a flashback to younger (by a decade), awkward teen drama queen Rebecca Bunch and her summer fling with a boy named Josh, which he ended unceremoniously, we meet present time Rebecca. She’s a young attorney in New York with a promising career ahead of her,  about to be named Junior Partner at her firm. She’s also quite unhappy with her life, which revolves around work, and her annoying (and very one-sided) phone conversations with her mother aren’t exactly making things easier.

She is so depressed (sad? pathetic? any of these could apply) in fact, that an ad butter asking ‘when was the last time you were happy?’ starts to affect her. Just as her bosses announce her promotion, she freaks out, runs outside and turns to her trusty stash of what I’m assuming are antidepressants or anxiety pills or a combination of the two.

As luck would have it, she not only sees a giant billboard of the same butter ad, she also runs into Josh, the ex boyfriend who dumped her 10 years before. It’s clearly a sign! She instantly mistakes his kind comments for flirting but her excitement about seeing him again is soon quelled by his announcement that he’s moving back home, to the happy town of West Covina, CA.

…aaaaand we get a musical number. About West Covina. Okay then.

And there you have it: she quits her job, moves to the west coast, gets a job at a local firm (although firm might be too strong a word) and texts Josh. At this point, Crazy Ex Girlfriend should just be called Stalker, really. She looks him up on facebook, monitors his check-ins, and goes for a Josh-hunt, where she meets Greg, who happens to be friends with Josh. Greg asks her out to a party, where Josh might also be. Say no more, Greg: cue musical number #2, which is a spin on the requisite getting-ready-for-the-big-date montage.

Really:

Of course Josh never shows up. Have I mentioned that he never texted her back, either? No matter: Rebecca keeps one eye at each entrance as she makes out with Greg, who is getting increasingly annoyed by her behavior, which turns psycho when he reveals that Josh moved home to be with his girlfriend, to which Rebecca reacts by crying as she’s making out with poor Greg.

Meanwhile, nosy paralegal Paula has apparently made it her life’s goal to find out why the hell a Harvard educated attorney would leave the big leagues to join a small town firm in the middle of nowhere, and follows Rebecca to the party.

When Rebecca tells the story of how she got there, she has an epiphany, which also happens to be the only normal reaction to anything she’s had so far in the pilot episode: she realizes she’s crazy. But no, Paula won’t have her second-guessing herself. She’s in luuuurve, so she goes from suspicious to crazy bestie in 3 seconds flat, and vows to help her win Josh back. Stalker now has a nifty middle-aged sidekick!

And then Josh finally texts back and asks her out to dinner.

 

Okay, for one thing, the premise of the show is so trite there are probably 10 rom-coms out there with the same exact plot. And it’s always the crazy girlfriend giving up her dream job to follow some random guy across the country, isn’t it? That, along with the musical numbers and the fact that this is obviously supposed to be a comedy yet I didn’t even crack a smile the entire time, make it entirely unlikely that I’ll watch Episode 2.

 

Verdict: Nah.

 

 

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